


MAN EATER.

by shogas



Category: One Piece
Genre: AU, Cannibalism, Comedy, Eventual Smut, Gen, Horror, M/M, Mild Gore, Modern AU, Slasher, Slasher AU, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-16
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:36:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27587573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shogas/pseuds/shogas
Summary: Luffy's a connoisseur of meat, but there's one specific kind he's been DYING to try out...
Relationships: Monkey D. Luffy/Vinsmoke Sanji
Comments: 12
Kudos: 65





	1. I.

Working late at the Baratie was something Sanji was accustom to by now. A deep sigh of relief flew past his parted lips, thankful to finally have some well deserved time off. He’d been working at the local restaurant for three years and was no stranger to leaving after 11pm. What he WASN’T used to was feeling a small, curvy figure pressed up against him from behind as he tried to get into his car after a long, tiring day. “You look like you’d make a decent meal,” the figure's voice whispered to him and him alone. The blond was tense, but still he was able to keep himself somewhat composed. “Come now, my dear, I’d love to cook for you but it’s so late. Why don’t you swing by tomorrow and I’ll cook you up something...” he began, a knife slowly creeping it’s way up to his neck. “...Special,” Sanji managed to choke out, everything in his body freezing up at once; his limbs, his mind, and even his heart. 

There was never a moment in his life when he would have hesitated over an instance such as this. He’d mentally gone over this exact scenario dozens, maybe hundreds of times by now!! Though he had to admit, he’d never imagine this situation would be played out with a WOMAN as his offender, and being the gentleman he was, it took him by surprise. “See, that’s not really what I meant when I said ‘you’d make a good meal.’ I MEAN I’m gonna cut you up, throw you in a fire and EAT you!!”

He was disgusted by how bouncy and excited the voice was, talking about murder and cannibalism in the same breath. It made his stomach twist. “R-Really? no seasoning? No recipe?? Just straight into the fire... That wouldn’t make for a very satisfying meal,” Sanji let out a rasped and dry chuckle, trying to buy himself time to muster up the courage to do something about his situation. It wasn't like he WANTED to HURT her, per-say, but if push came to shove...

“Wait, seasonings??” the offender sounded confused, spinning Sanji so they could be face-to-face. Even in the low glow of parking lot lights, the blond could vaguely make out his captor’s features; short, messy black hair cupped a pair of round tanned cheeks. Dark eyes with early signs of dark circles and under eye bags, a scar under the left eye that seemed to curve and follow the lower lid. A baggy red sleeved baseball tee matched with a pair of black shorts covering every curve, giving off a flat formed figure at first glance. And the height difference, that was what shocked him most. The two were at LEAST a foot apart. “You can season people meat? Like you would with steak or something??” The dark haired knife wielder’s brow’s furrowed, clearly never having thought of cannibalizing people as if they were normal food. 

“My dear lady,” Sanji cooed, nearly forgetting the situation he'd been caught in, before getting cut off by the cannibal. “I’m a boy,” the assailant said flatly, blinking at the cook. What? He simply gawked at the cannibal, processing the new and information that honestly threw him off. Now he felt down right embarrassed. “You’re... I’m so sorry, man. My mistake,” he apologized, face growing hot as the man with the knife shrugged. He shrugged? “S’okay, it happens sometimes, I understand. Hey, do you think you could teach me more about seasonings? And show me some good recipes, I wanna eat something tasty!!” the dark haired man laughed, turning the somber and anxiety inducing energy and turning it silly and peppy. 

So, he WASN’T gonna eat him? Not only that, but how had this gone so nonchalantly from a potential murder to a request for a COOKING LESSON?? Sanji’s lips were parted as the two stared at one another, the silence in the parking lot deafening. Was this really the same guy that had just held a knife to his throat, threatening to chop him up for supper? “ARE YOU COMPLETELY INSANE?!!” the cook finally yelled out, stomping his foot in frustration and disbelief (as well as dramatic effect), making the other man wince. There was no way in HELL he’d ever take the man up on his request. He'd have to be out of his damn mind to even CONSIDER that an option.


	2. II.

Alright, maybe he WAS out of his damn mind. He had to be to not only have let this freak get in his car, but take him to his apartment. Under any other circumstance, he wouldn't have let this happen, but after the scar eyed man begged him-- literally BEGGED him on his hands and knees-- Sanji caved. It was going to be fine, he thought. His roommates Usopp and Nami were both off from work that night, so nothing TERRIBLE could happen! And if he really needed help, if he DESPERATELY NEEDED HELP... His ex-boyfriend Zoro lived across the hall. Everything would be totally fine! 

" _Went over to Franky and Robin's for a bit. Back later! -Nami and Usopp_ ," the sticky note read, lovingly written and placed on the kitchen counter. A pit of dread settled in his stomach. He was alone in his home with a killer. Not just a killer, a _cannibal_. One that threatened his life not even twenty minutes ago at that!! Why was he so damn soft? Why did he say yes to this guy who begged him to teach him how to cook? Why... Why was he sitting at the kitchen island like he'd been there before? "What do you think you're doing getting so comfortable?" Sanji asked, crossing his arms over his chest. The man blinked, shooting the blond a big toothy smile, a gap apparent in his front teeth. It was... Kind of charming, actually. "I'm waitin' for you to show me how to cook something tasty," He laughed, swinging his legs from the bar stool where he sat, arms crossed atop the marbled island. 

"Fine," Sanji sighed. There was no use in waiting or putting it off, he might as well jump right into the ordeal. "I'll gather the ingredients, why don't you tell me about yourself. For starters, you haven't given me your name yet. Mine's Sanji." The dark haired stranger smiled, "Sanji... I like that name! Mine's Luffy!!" Luffy? He'd never heard that one before, though 'Sanji' wasn't all that common either. The blond chuckled as he retrieved a paper wrapped cut of meat from the fridge. "Luffy's an interesting name. What's it mean?" Though he was grabbing fresh herbs and produce from around the kitchen to accompany the meat, he made sure to look to Luffy every now and again, waiting for a reply. He seemed to be in deep thought for a moment before deciding to respond by shrugging, "I dunno, I just picked it cuz it sounds cool."

Because it sounded cool? The ridiculous sounding answer nearly made him drop the clove of garlic he'd grabbed. "Seriously? It's not even your real name?" Sanji grumbled. The question actually seemed to irritate Luffy, his legs no longer swinging, arms flexing as he grabbed onto his shirt sleeves. "IT IS MY REAL NAME!! MY NAME IS MONKEY D. LUFFY, GOT IT!?" It went quiet, shuffling from down the hall was all that could be heard. Sanji just gaped at the aggravated man. "I'm sorry," Sanji muttered out pathetically. The soft apology seemed to have caught him off guard, as his grip loosened and he turned his head away with a sheepish look on his face. "...It's a good name," the cook encouraged with a tiny smile on his face, trying to lighten the mood. 

Luffy just nodded, gaze still turned away from his host out of embarrassment; whether it was for the outburst or receiving and apology, Sanji wasn't quite sure, but he knew that the blush on his guest's cheeks was kind of appealing. "Hey, why don't you come help me cut up this garlic? And tell me why you tried to end me back in the Baratie lot back there," He half teased. It was lighthearted but Sanji was genuinely concerned; was he the first target? Did Luffy even have the gall to actually kill him back there? And if he did end up getting killed, would Luffy actually eat him? Luffy got up, grabbed a knife from the wooden block on the counter behind him and went to work mincing the garlic he was presented. "I told you already," the dark haired man began, "I was gonna eat you. But now I don't have to cuz you're teachin' me how to cook."

This was... Information he already had. At this point, he's just repeating himself. "Come on, tell me why you wanted to eat me. I'm pretty scrawny, y'know, I don't think I'd be all that appetizing," Sanji laughed, watching Luffy, as he unwrapped the paper packaged meat, revealing it as a nice slab of premium beef. "Testosterone," Luffy replied, not bothering to look away from his task, in fear of his host's reaction. "I've been denied prescriptions from my doctor and therapists at least 13 times and I got tired of it. I'm taking things into my own hands, I guess. I know it seems kind of extreme, what I'm doing but I'm sort of desperate." The host chose not to stare or give any sort of reaction that could be taken as negative, instead choosing to cut the beef into decent sized uniform chunks. "Y'know there's other things you can eat and do to boost testosterone? I'm not... Well, our bodies are different, but I was kind of the runt of my family growing up and I needed a little boost myself. I could show you--" Luffy put down the knife, shoving his cutting board of garlic in Sanji's direction. "I already know about the alternatives. It'd take too long, I don't wanna wait that long to see results!!" He whined, looking at Sanji with a sick kind of determination. 

When the cook looked up into the cannibal's eyes, he swore he could see his pupils spiraling with a special kind of madness that made his heart flutter. "...How many? As of now, how many people have you..." Sanji's voice was dry and caught in his throat, as he looked back down to the meat he was in the middle of prepping. Luffy, now slicing up the lemon that sat in the pile of fresh produce in front of him, shrugged; something he seemed to do a lot. "I dunno. Maybe three? Or... No, I think four," he nodded, sounding quite confident in his memory. Four. He had four victims, four people he killed, cut up and ate. Sanji had to put down his knife and step away for a moment, feeling dizzy and a bit queasy at the thought of being number five. Hell, if HE was the fifth, what'd the other four look like? Were they as tiny as he was? Did Luffy get any results from the other victims??

"Hey, Sanji, you look like you're gonna pass out," Luffy stated matter-of-factly. The cook shook his head, hands on his knees, and with one quick move, he was back to normal. "I'm fine, don't worry!! Why don't we finish this dish, yeah?" Sanji smiled, started up the stove,an expensive looking stainless steel pan placed on the burner. With a skilled hand, the cook combined the fresh cut lemon, garlic, rosemary and a bit of pink salt with the premium chunks of beef. Luffy watched on in awe, never having seen such precision so close up before. The scent of sizzling meat made the guest's mouth water, something Sanji noticed upon looking over to the mesmerized man beside him. "Hey, do you think you could leave it kinda bloody?" Luffy requested, much to the cook's disdain. "Just how bloody are you thinking? This is a really good cut of meat, I'm not letting you eat it completely rare, I was gonna get it medium rare at least," Sanji sighed, brow furrowed. 

"RARE!! MAKE IT RARE!!" Luffy laughed and cheered the word. The poor cook felt himself crumble to the peer pressure, quickly taking the pan from the hot burner, sliding it to an inactive one, preparing to plate the imperfect meal. The short man practically ran over to the marble island to take his seat, practically bouncing in his seat. Although unsatisfied with the meal he made, Sanji still made an effort to make it look pretty, plating it with lemon wedges on the side of the meat, garnishing it with a sprig of rosemary. "Here, it's not gonna taste as good since it didn't get time to fully soak in the flavor of the accents, but let me know what you think."

It was sort of appalling how fast and messy Luffy ate, blood and juices dripping from his mouth and down onto his shirt. "Thish ish reawwy good, Sanshi!!" He complimented the man between horrendously sloppy mouthfuls. "Don't talk with your mouth full, you pig!!" Sanji scolded the man, going so far as to playfully smack him over the head with his knuckles. Luffy couldn't help but laugh. He'd never had such good food much less in such good company. Seeing how much the man enjoyed his meal, Sanji nodded, having come to a decision he'd been thinking on for a while. "If you like that then why don't we come to a nice little agreement; You bring me meat, don't tell me what it is, I don't wanna know. Just bring it to me here and I'll cook it up for you, sound good?"

He blinked his dark circle clad eyes at the blond, absorbing the information that was just thrown at him. He didn't have to attempt to cook his own meals? This pretty blond would do it FOR him? And all he had to do was bring by the meat!! What a deal! Luffy smiled widely, swallowing his mouthful and said, "It's a deal!! I'll bring you the best slabs of meat I can hunt down!!"


	3. III.

Now he was sweating, racing the clock. His roommates could be home any minute now from their outing with Franky and Robin, and here he was sat in the kitchen with a cannibal he'd just met. How the hell was he gonna explain this to them? No, Sanji had to take Luffy home and quick. "Come on, it's getting late and I have an early shift at the Baratie tomorrow. Why don't you let me drive you home," Sanji offered, his gentlemanly side shining through. Though he knew the blond meant well, Luffy shrugged him off as he hopped off of the kitchen stool. His flip-flop clad feet landed on the floor with a cute little slap. "No thanks, I can get to my place on my own. I'm the guy that tried to kill you a couple hours ago, remember? I'll be okay!" The way he brought that scene back up was so nonchalant. It made a chill crawl down the cook's spine. How was he so calm and collected about such a gruesome situation?!

"Well, can I at least walk you down?" Sanji again offered, trying to give the killer his best sincere grin, despite being a bit thrown by his casualness. Luffy at least agreed to that much, which sort of put the cook at ease. As he grabbed his apartment key and phone, the blond realized something; he hadn't gotten anyway to contact Luffy for their new found agreement. Was it smart to give this man his phone number? What was the worst that could happen, he's already been inside of Sanji's home as well as been given a knife to cut garlic after being held hostage in the parking lot. What was one more huge red flag?? "Hey, would you mind giving me your number? I can text you the days I'm free to cook for you and we can talk recipes too, if you'd like," he turned to the short man, phone out and ready to receive contact information. Luffy nodded with another cute gap-toothed grin, taking Sanji's phone rather than listing off a number. It was only a moment before the phone was back in the owner's hands. "That was quick," he muttered. Oh no. 

His name was now listed in Sanji's phone as "LUFFY!" followed by a meat, rainbow and devil emoji. Dammit, was he being cute on purpose? Trying to win the cook over? Or maybe it was a deeper, darker scheme... Or, he was completely overthinking it and Luffy was just a silly and cute kind of guy. Whatever the case, looking at the new contact made his heart stir in his chest. Shaking off the sudden feelings for the man, Sanji pocketed his phone, opened the door to the apartment, and followed behind Luffy to the elevators right down the hall from his place. "So, how far are you from here?" the blond asked, trying to strike up a casual convo. "Mm, not too far," Luffy replied, hitting the button for the 2nd floor once inside. What? Had he hit the wrong button without noticing? Sanji brushed it off, leaning over to press the ground floor button himself, which got him a confused look from his companion. "Didja forget something in your car?" Luffy pondered, tilting his head at the cook. Now it was his turn to be confused. "What're you talking about? You hit the two by mistake, didn't you?" 

The dark haired man looked back at the buttons, the bell for the second floor alerting the two of their arrival, doors slowly dragging open. "Nah, my place is right down the hall here, see?" Luffy got out of the elevator first, pointing straight down the hallway to the furthest apartment at the end. Where the light flickered, threatening to die at any moment. Green carpet of the hall stained conveniently outside the door of his apartment. How fitting, and cliche, for a cannibal to live in quite possibly the shadiest place in the whole building. What kind of creepy, tacky horror movie level shenanigans had poor Sanji gotten himself into here? "...Right. Want me to walk you to your door?" He rubbed the back of his head, feeling sort of awkward and embarrassed. He wasn't sure _why_ , the feeling sat in his chest just stirring around. Luffy gently declined his offer with a shake of his head, waving him off and giving him a cheerful "goodnight!"

Once the exhausted blond got back to his abode, he was greeted by his two very intoxicated roommates. "Saaanjii!" Usopp slurred, slinging an arm around the cook's shoulders. "Did'chu cook somethin' really good without'us?? It smells great in here, I'm so hungryy!!" Sanji scowled, turning his nose away from Usopp, trying to escape the smell of beer and whiskey. Nami, however, was a more refined drunk, simply sprawled across the couch on her stomach, watching the two push and pull each other across the entryway. "Sanjii, make me some tea... I don't wanna hangover tomorrow," the redhead whined, reaching a hand out dramatically towards him. How could he say no to his closest friend, especially when she was in need? He didn't want her hungover any more than she wanted to be!! "Of course, dear," He chuckled, sitting Usopp in the armchair across from Nami. The two simply watched as their blonde savior began working away in the kitchen, making them tea and grilled cheese. "You're an angel, Sanji," Nami weakly cheered, her arms in the air. "Better th'n an angel... He's a suuuper angel," Usopp laughed, clearly imitating Franky as he waved his arms in the air in unison with his roommate.

After getting his friends something to soak up the alcohol in their bellies, he sent them both off to bed and got ready to finally get some rest himself. While brushing his teeth, he noticed something in the reflection; a small nick on his neck. And it certainly wasn't from shaving. Luffy must have actually gotten him when he'd held that knife against his neck in the parking lot. Luffy. Having been distracted by his two best friends coming home from their own long night made him almost entirely forget about his own. He finished taking care of his nightly routine, cleaned the small injury on his neck, changed into a black tee and just his boxers and lied down in bed, scrolling through social media for a moment before rolling over to fall asleep. As badly as he wished he could pass out right then and there, his mind had other plans. "I wonder if Luffy's in bed," Sanji thought aloud to himself. What was _his_ nightly routine? Did he even sleep at night? Maybe the darkness was the perfect time to claim victims. Maybe he was nocturnal. Or maybe he was nestled up in bed, clinging to a pillow, thinking of all the food he'd get to enjoy, handcrafted by Sanji himself. Or perhaps he was curled up thinking about Sanji the way Sanji was thinking about him. WHY was he even thinking so hard about Luffy? 

"Oh, man," he grumbled, letting out a long sigh shortly after. The realization had sunk in. "I'm infatuated with Luffy."


	4. IV.

By the time eight in the morning came around, his phone alarm was going off with no intention of stopping, but that was fine. He was already up on the balcony having a cigarette, accepting that he wasn't going to be getting any sleep that night what with all of his Luffy related thoughts running through his mind. Stubbing his now dead smoke on the balcony railing, Sanji sighed, letting plumes flow from his nose as he came in to put an end to his phone's obnoxious notification. He took a moment to stretch, work out the kink in his neck and start his day off with some breakfast. 

As he got to work making himself some eggs, he wondered if he should text Luffy and ask him to come over for some breakfast. The thought of the man enjoying another of his fine cooked meals made his heart flutter and a goofy grin work it's way to his face. There was a moment of hesitation though; what if the two woke up his roommates? What would they think and what could he tell them about his breakfast guest? Due to his better judgement, he passed on the idea. For now, anyway. Sanji pulled himself into a daydream as he finished cooking breakfast. He ate in silence, thinking about what it'd be like to have Luffy over as an actual guest. Brushed his teeth, thinking about introducing him to Nami and Usopp. Changed his clothes with the thought of he and Luffy going steady. Got in the elevator imagining how nice it'd be to just hold hands with him. And his lovey dovey thoughts went right down the drain as the lobby doors open to reveal Zoro, sweaty and glistening with his gym bag slung over his shoulder.

The men exchanged grunts, Sanji's face dropping to a neutral expression as he passed his ex to get to his car. Well, that was one way to get his mind back on track, he thought as he got in his little red car. He pulled out of the apartment's lot and headed on the road to work. Traffic was very low this time of day, which was something he was thankful for, because no matter how hard he tried to push the thoughts from his mind, Sanji just couldn't help but think about _Zoro_. "Stupid asshole," he muttered to his empty passenger seat. "Who asked him to show his dumb bottle dyed green head on my perfect morning!!" 

Between parking his car and entering the restaurant, all Sanji could do was mumble under his breath about his shitty (but still kind of hot) ex-boyfriend. That was, until he felt a pair of hands rest on his shoulders. "Oh, dear gorgeous Sanji, is that vile ex of yours still driving you up the wall? Hasn't it bee months already?" Sanji turned, looking back to see his favorite waitress (and self proclaimed "work wife"), Bon. The sight of their smiling face, dolled up in a way that resembled Dolly Parton, was enough to make the blond shake him of his grumpy stature. "Bon, darling! Why, with you around this morning, my day's one thousand times better now," He beamed to his tall coworker. They giggled, giving Sanji a gentle, teasing nudge. Despite how much the two would flirt back and forth during their shifts, they had no real attraction to one another. Rather, they were each other's support system and would definitely be caught going out every once in a while during a shared day off or after work, going shopping or stopping by a bar. They'd been working together since day one and learned a lot from each other, finding many similarities between themselves, specifically their gender and sexuality. 

"Actually, come to think of it," Sanji began, "Why are you here so early?" His friend smirked, leaning down to whisper to him. "Didn't you hear? Some big shot doctor bought the whole place out for brunch! He and a few of his doctor friends and family are coming by for a few hours!" A big shot doctor? Of course the Baratie was a fairly nice restaurant, but surely there were places much classier a guy like that would want to dine. But hey, that really wasn't up to him in the end. He was just there to cook and that's exactly what he was planning on doing. 

Around ten, the doctor made his appearance. He was welcomed and seated by Bon, as were the rest of his party that trickled in shortly after. It wasn't a very large party, like some of the staff expected, rather a small group of people who seemed to just want a few hours of peace to themselves. There was the head of the party, a man with dark hair and a tired face, a tall lanky blond man with a cute heart pattern button down that Bon made sure to compliment, one with tinted glasses and shaggy hair, and another with a rather plain face and penguin pin on his button down collar. There was soft chatter between the large table as the rather tall waitress went around taking orders, making light conversation here and there with the men gathered 'round. "You should see it out there, Sanji, not a bad looking one in sight," Bon winked as they handed Sanji the list of orders. The blond chuckled, looking over the slip of paper, amusing Bon with a reply, "Oh yeah? Any of 'em my type?"

They tapped their pink pen against their glossy lips, glancing at the ceiling. "Well, the head surgeon, the one that arranged the whole thing, he's pretty cute. He looks about your age, maybe a little older. Nice eyes, dark hair, and I think I saw some hand tattoos. That's weird, right? Doctors don't usually have tattoos!" Tattoos, huh? "Well, I guess I'll just have to take a look for myself," He smiled, turning to his kitchen staff, ready to fulfill the orders. 

In no time, the guests were served drinks, then meals soon to follow. Sanji gave a hand in delivering meals, partially to get a peak at the proclaimed "cute" head surgeon, and boy he wasn't disappointed. The man was, dare he say, beautiful; his eyes were gold. GOLD. He had slightly disheveled dark hair and a matching dark beard, tattoos on his knuckles that read "DEATH" (which he wasn't sure were ironic or not), and from what he could tell through the man's tight dark turtleneck, he had a pretty nice build. Sanji didn't realize just how hard he was gawking until the lanky blond man beside the surgeon spoke, "Law, these look almost too pretty to be food, don't you think?" Law rolled his eyes at the lanky man, teasingly saying, "Just take a picture, Cora. It'll last longer. Don't let the food go to waste." Sanji couldn't help but chuckle, causing the others to look up at him. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to laugh. I'm happy you like my meal presentation, but it'd be a real shame if you didn't get to taste it as well. Please, enjoy," the cook smiled before he walked back to the kitchen to give his patrons time to themselves. 

During the few hours the group was there, Bon had gone around refilling drinks, laughing with their guests and having small side convos with Sanji every now and then when he wasn't managing the kitchen staff. As the group began to wrap up their visit, having now paid and boxed up any left overs, the blond was requested to come to the front by the surgeon himself. He'd be lying if he said his heart didn't do a tiny flip at the summons. Law stood in the small front lobby of the restaurant, giving Sanji a good once over as he came closer. His face was pulled into a scowl before he said anything. "Thank you for the meal. My men and I had a wonderful time, hope to stop by again sometime," the surgeon smirked softly, turning to leave with the rest of his group. The blond was left there, speechless and red faced as he watched the dark haired man's back as he left. _Christ_ , he was hot. 

The rest of his shift seemed to fly by after that, lingering thoughts of the doctor keeping him distracted every now and then. He was sure to tell Nami and Usopp about this guy when he got home that evening. And Luffy. LUFFY. By God, he'd nearly forgotten about the poor boy. And to think, the day started with the little cannibal occupying every stretch of his mind... "I should ask him over for dinner," Sanji muttered to himself as he clocked out for the evening, phone in hand. He said his farewells to Bon and his kitchen staff and called Luffy up as soon as he got in his car. There were one... two... three rings before Luffy picked up on the other end. "Hello?" He answered, sounding out of breath. Sanji's heart skipped a beat at the tone of the man's voice on the other end. "H.. Hey!! I got off work early and I was wondering if you wanted me to come over and make you up some dinner?" There was a long, silent pause between them for a moment. Honestly, the blond began to worry, wondering if something had happened to his new colleague. "Lu?" He called the man's name, thinking he simply hadn't heard him. "I'D LOVE TO HAVE YOU OVER FOR DINNER!! I just got some fresh meat too, so this works out real well!! When do you think you'll be over?" Luffy finally gave his reply, a smile clearly on his face by how enthused he sounded. "Soon," Sanji chuckled, putting his phone on speaker as he started up his little red car, planting a cigarette between his lips, ready for the drive home.

The two had a brief conversation as Sanji drove back to the apartment, ending their call as he got on the elevator. He almost missed the button to Luffy's floor, being so used to going right up to his own apartment on floor six. It only took a minute before he was on the second floor, walking down the hallway that slowly got darker the further he walked. Creepy. Sanji let his knuckles tap the door with the mystery stain on the carpet out front. Gross. "Who is it?" A gentle voice came from the other side of the door. That sounded NOTHING like Luffy. "I-I'm sorry, I think I have the wrong apartment number!" Sanji chuckled nervously, backing away. But he was so sure this was Luffy's place! He watched him walk into this specific one when he saw him off the night before!! The shuffling of feet could be heard from the mistaken room, door swinging open to reveal his colleague in nothing more than a bralette and pair of sweats, blood sticking to his hair, chest and down his arms. "Sanji!!" His voice turned from gentle to the somewhat ragged and slightly more pitched down tone he was used to.

"Uh... Hey, Luffy! You're... Are you okay?" Sanji asked, feeling his face turn white as a cold sweat dripped down his forehead. God, that short little man was an absolute MESS! And to be honest, Sanji wasn't quite sure if he was afraid, concerned, or a little aroused. Possibly all three. "Yeah, I'm fine," He quirked an eyebrow as he gave his answer. "This isn't my blood. I'm okay. Just... Don't go in the bathroom, 'kay?" Sanji just nodded, slowly dragging himself into the other's apartment. There wasn't much mess anywhere aside from on Luffy, it seemed. The place was trashed, but in a normal way; more so a single college kid's room and less of a blood soaked murder scene, which gave the blond some relief. "So... What're you in the mood for, Lu?" Sanji pondered, not sure when or why he started using that little nickname for the guy. They had literally known each other for less than a day. Why was he already giving him nicknames and falling all over himself for the guy?? Luffy looked over from the kitchen sink where he was washing his stick red hands and flashed a gap-toothed smile. That was it. That's what had initially gotten him hooked on the man. "Can we make some barbecue!!?"

Barbecue. That sounded nice in theory, but with one quick look through Luffy's cabinet's and fridge, Sanji was reminded as to why the two had become "friends" in the first place; Luffy didn't keep spices of any kind around the house. "Damn, I should've stopped by the store before coming over," he mumbled to himself, crouched down in front of the open fridge. "I'm sorry, I guess we got too caught up in conversation while you were driving back here," Luffy laughed, comically bonking himself on the head with his fist. Sanji shook his head, smiling softly at the man. "Why don't you just pack some meat and we can cook it up at my place, yeah?" The cook's idea made the cannibal light up with joy. Any excuse to go over to the nice, clean apartment he lived in. 

The short man was practically skipping over to the bathroom to claim a good hunk of meat for his dinner at Sanji's. The door to the bathroom swung open, and though it went against his better judgement, something inside of the blond told him to look over into the small doorway. It was dim, not much light came through, but everything was just bright enough for him to see the silhouette of a man slumped over in the bath tub, blood reflecting off the floor in a great puddle. Luffy stood over the tub corpse with a meat cleaver now in hand, going in for the torso with one big strong blow. The sound of metal beating into flesh, the squelching and splattering of blood, it made Sanji's stomach turn. He had to get the hell out of there before he was sick. "Hey, I'm... I'm just gonna step out front. Why don't you get your meat and change and come get me when you're ready," He called out, stumbling over himself out the front door. 

That could've been him in that bath tub. That could be his body the man was currently carving up. If he hadn't said anything the night before, he was sure that would be his fate currently. Dear God, was he happy to be on Luffy's good side. "Sorry, I didn't mean to freak you out," Luffy's voice came from behind him. He'd changed into a pair of jean shorts and a red hoodie, with an opaque container in hand. Right. His dinner. "Don't... Don't mention it! Let's go make you some barbecue!" He was clearly still shaken, but Sanji gave his best attempt to be cheerful for his little dinner guest. This was fine. This was something he'd just force himself to get used to.


	5. V.

Luffy seemed elated as he sat once again up on the island stool in Sanji's kitchen. His knees rocked the seat back and forth as he leaned over, watching the blond man combine ingredients in an attempt to make a home made marinade for the "barbecue". Sanji slowed his mixing hand for a moment and looked at Luffy, asking, "So, tell me. What'd you do today?" He was hoping to get to know the man a little better, and what would help him more than such a simple question. 

He tilted his head in thought, eyes drifting from the cook up to the ceiling. What _did_ he do today? "Let's see... I had the day off, so I did some boring laundry, played some online games with Ace before he had to go to work, and uh... Oh, right! I put Mr. Moria on fresh ice in the bath tub!" Sanji diverted his gaze back to the sauce he'd been preparing. Right, Mr. Moria. He'd tried pushing that imagery from his mind, but it was harder now that his guest had put it back out into the open. The sound of the cleaver being swung into the lumbering man's body echoed in the back of his mind and almost made him gag. He had to find a way to distract his mind from replaying that horrid scene.

"So, who's Ace? A friend? A... A boyfriend?" the last half of Sanji's question came out almost by force, as if he didn't want to ask or know the answer. Luffy only laughed. "No, he's not my boyfriend! He's my older brother!! We don't get to really see each other any more since he became a fire fighter, so every now and then when he does get some free time, we facetime and play games together," he replied, smiling brightly, clearly happy to talk about his brother. It was actually... kind of refreshing to see someone that was able to speak highly of their family. Between himself and his roommates, family was always such a taboo and solemn topic. "Hey, glad to hear you guys had fun today! Did you win any games?" Sanji asked, wanting to keep the conversation afloat. "Nah, he totally kicked my butt. It's not fair, he never even has time to get GOOD at any of these games, so how's he keep winning?!!" Luffy pouted, playfully banging his fists against the marble island counter top.

His guest's little display made Sanji chuckle as he grabbed the opaque box of meat. Upon opening the container, his smile wavered, remembering exactly what was inside. "Oh, s-speaking of things that happened today!" The blond began, followed by a dry swallow. "You'll never guess what happened! I saw the prettiest group of doctors at the restaurant!!" Yes, that's it. He'd take his mind off of things by recalling the handsome men he got to serve at work. While he distracted himself, as well as entertain his guest, he'd simply pretend he was cutting up beef. "Woah, pretty doctors? That's cool," Luffy replied with awe, eyes wide. "Yeah, one was really tall, way taller than six feet! And there was a really interesting one with knuckle tattoos... Oh man, he was incredible," Sanji cooed, though he almost felt bad praising the men while his crush sat right in front of him just listening. When he looked to Luffy, he noticed a scowl on his face. Oh no, was he ACTUALLY upset that he was praising another man?? "The tattoo guy... Did he have dark circles under his eyes? And a beard?" The dark haired man asked, scowl still prominent. Sanji could only nod in agreement. 

After a moment of silence, Luffy's scowl turned into another one of those heart melting gap-toothed smiles. "That's my ex-boyfriend, Traffy!!" His ex-boyfriend? HIS ex-boyfriend?!! He was in disbelief, so shocked that he had stopped cutting the chunks of flesh that he'd convinced himself were beef. "You? And... And him?" Sanji stuttered out, harmlessly pointing his knife in Luffy's direction. The cannibal simply nodded. "Uh huh. For two years! We broke up 'cause he said he isn't good at balancing work and a relationship. But we're still friends! We text each other almost everyday!"

They texted. The cannibal and the hot surgeon. They DATED. FOR TWO YEARS. The information felt like a recipe in a foreign language, he just couldn't process it. "Th-That's great to hear you guys still get along so well!" Sanji awkwardly praised as he went back to cutting. "Not everyone is able to remain friends with a partner after a break up! ...Especially when your ex is a stupid muscle head moss ball loser," He added, attitude slowly going from uncouth to an almost humorous anger. Luffy's interest was peaked at this new side of his blond acquaintance. "What happened with you and your ex? Was it ugly? Tell me!" He goaded on, kicking his feet over the edge of the stool, knees pressed hard against the seat.

The blond began to toss the meat into the previously made marinade, cheeks going red as he realized just how much he'd gotten worked up over Zoro in less than a moment. "Oh, uh... It's nothing! We just had an argument over something dumb and uh... We don't really talk to each other anymore, that's all!" He wasn't lying, but he wasn't telling Luffy everything either. And for now, that's how he'd leave things. "Aw, that's lame! If your argument was dumb, you two should just kiss and makeup!!" Luffy puffed out his cheeks as he pouted. It was sort of endearing, but what he said was enough to make the cook think twice before blushing, choosing instead to poke the cannibal in the forehead and grumble, "Drop it."

With the food now all in a bowl, Sanji covered it with plastic wrap and left it in the fridge so the meat could soak in the sauce. "Well, this'll need to rest for about half an hour. Wanna come out on the balcony and have a smoke with me?" He asked, grabbing a pack from the couch side table as he walked past it. "I don't smoke, but I'll come outside with you," Luffy smiled, tagging along behind his host. The two took seats on opposite garden chairs, Luffy choosing to sit criss-cross and Sanji sitting with one leg widely swung over the other. There was a comfortable silence between them for a moment as the blond lit his cigarette. He took a deep inhale, the end turning to ash, red illuminating his face before he let out swirls of white smoke from his parted lips and nostrils. Not realizing the other was staring, he was surprised to hear the soft giggle as he leaned closer. "Sanji, you're so cool!!" 

He could feel himself grow hot and flustered. Cool. He thought he was cool. "Wh-what?" was all Sanji could sheepishly whimper out. Before the two could carry on, the front door was swung open, followed by loud groaning. Nami and Usopp must be home. "Out back," the blond directed, waving his hand in front of the sliding glass door. Luffy whipped his head around, peaking over the back of his chair to get a look at the pair that had just come in. "Who's that? Roommates?" He asked, scowling as he looked over the two as they got closer. Oh, shit. He had to introduce them all, that's right. 

Sanji stubbed his half smoked cigarette on the balcony railing and got to his feet, opening the sliding door for his friends to come out. "Nami, Usopp, there's someone I'd like you to meet. This is my friend Luffy, we met at the Baratie yesterday. Luffy, these are my best friends and roommates, Nami and Ussop." Yeah, he was going to keep this meeting as casual and normal as he could. They met at the restaurant! That was totally true! He wasn't gonna bring up the fact that Luffy tried to off him in the parking lot for Sunday dinner! 

"Hey, I'm Luffy, nice t'meetcha!" He gave the two what was quite possibly the cutest smile Sanji had seen yet. It sent his heart aflutter. "I'm Nami, it's nice to meet you too!" She smiled back. Usopp jutted a thumb at his chest, making a grand introduction. "I'm the great Usopp! General Manager of the GameStop at the mall!! If you've got any questions about any video games, don't hesitate to ask, I've played every video game known to man!!" Luffy looked on in awe, while Nami and Sanji couldn't help but roll their eyes at Usopp's tall tale. There was no way he could've played every video game known to man and Luffy had to know that, right? "Usopp, you're awesome! Tell me all the cheats in Street Fighter so I can beat my big brother," the small man begged, eyes wide and full of determination. Okay, he was an idiot. A cute, gap-toothed, man eating idiot. Who Sanji couldn't help but swoon over. And now that he'd met his best friends, he'd never hear the end of it. Great.


	6. VI.

Since they'd all been briefly introduced, the group made their way back into the apartment and took seats on the couch. Luffy and Usopp were in deep conversation about Street Fighter, Nami scrolled through her phone with her head resting on Usopp’s shoulder and Sanji went back into his sanctuary, the kitchen, to check on Luffy’s meal. “Sanji, I’m starving! What’s for dinner?” the red head whined, looking over at him from her place on the couch. The cook perked up and turned to his beloved friend with a sweet smile. “What are you in the mood to eat, my dear?” His sweet voice was so sincere and gooey. It was enough to catch Luffy's attention. Or maybe it was just the mention of food that made him turn his head towards the kitchen.

Either way, the cannibal and cook had made eye contact now and Sanji could feel his heart stutter. “Why don’t you make us some pasta? I’ve been thinking about fettucini all day,” Nami replied, eyes back on her phone as she snuggled into Usopp’s shoulder. It took a moment before he realized she’d replied to him. “Oh… Oh, of course! I’d love nothing more than to prepare you the finest pasta dish you’ll ever taste,” He doted on. His response made Luffy laugh as he moved from his place on the couch, finding his way into the kitchen. “Hey, I want some pasta too, Sanji!” The short man demanded.

The blond was crouched down to grab a pot from the lower cupboard and popped back up promptly with a furrowed brow and finger wagging in the others face. “Don’t be greedy, I’m already making you your special meal.” It wasn’t the reaction Luffy was expecting, causing him to groan and flop over the island dramatically. “But Sanji, it’s not fair that you guys get to eat delicious pasta! I want some too!!” Nami and Usopp could be heard giggling amongst themselves in the living room at the two, peaking over the back of the couch. Sanji’s face heated up, practically steaming from embarrassment as he caved in. “Fine, look… I’ll let you have some of mine, okay?” 

Luffy couldn’t help but smile after hearing his whining and pleading worked. And how couldn’t it with Sanji as smitten as he was? While the two seemed preoccupied with each other, Nami called out, “Geez, how old are you? You sound like a selfish little kid!” There wasn’t any _real_ malice in her tone, and though Luffy knew the question was rhetorical, he turned back to give her an answer anyway. “Oh, I’m 23,” He stated flatly. The answer came as a shock to everyone, even Sanji. “For real?!! You look like a kid! I thought you were at most 19,” Usopp gave an awkward chuckle, rubbing the back of his neck. With a grin, Luffy hooked his index finger inside of his mouth and gave his cheek a tug as he replied, “Nope, I guess I just have a baby face!”

“Sanji, why do YOU look so shocked? You’re pretty cautious when you have guests,” Nami quirked her brow at the cook as she spoke. She was right. He knew she was right, but he couldn’t exactly tell her that he was simply a tool for the little man eater. Or that he had a dangerous crush on him either. “Well…” He began as he filled the pot before him with water. Luffy turned to Nami with his head tilted and said, “He was just teaching me how to cook. Why would it matter how old I am for that?” Nice save. Sanji simply nodded in agreement to what his short friend had stated, sighing a breath of relief in the back of his mind. “Yeah, just watch out for that guy, Luffy. He’s a total playboy,” Nami teased with a smirk. 

No. No, no, no, she didn't just say that. Why would she say that? He knew she was just playing, but holy shit did that one statement make his entire heart drop into the pit of his stomach and simmer there like a filet on a hot pan. What was worse was when Luffy finally turned back around with those wide dark eyes. Now he was the center of attention with all of his dear friends staring as if he were on display. "I-I'm not a playboy!! Admiring someone and doting on them is NOT something a playboy would do!! How mean," He whined out in a pathetic attempt to save face. The couched duo gave a small laugh at their dramatic roommate, but Luffy just smiled, leaning closer to Sanji from across the island counter. "Don't sweat it, I still think you're cool, Sanji!! Even if you are a playboy like Nami says you are!" 

Well. At least he was still in the "cool" category. He gave Luffy a simple "thanks" as he got started on dinner for the lot of them. Pasta was brought to a boil, sauce simmered and mixed to perfection and his little man eater's special meal was thrown into it's own pan on a low heat. "Make it rare!! Make it rare!!" Luffy cheered with a laugh, causing Sanji nothing but pain. Why couldn't he let the cook perfect his meal instead of demanding it half finished? But he complied none the less. It was his preference after all, and he was the one that was going to eat it. 

"Dinner is served, my dears," Sanji chimed, setting the dinner table for the four of them. In mere moments the group had gathered round sitting next to one another for the gorgeous meal the blond had prepared. Everyone began eating, talking and laughing together and honestly, it felt nice. They hadn't all sat down together for a meal like this in quite some time, whether it be because of their conflicting work schedules or the convenience of fast food on the way home after a long day. And having Luffy fill the single vacant seat at their dinner table made things all the more special. "Hey, what's that you've got, Luffy? Smells good," Usopp commented, looking over his new friend's unusual dish. Oh no, Oh god. "It's beef, part of his diet. He's got a special diet he has to stick to for health reasons," Sanji intervened, terrified of the truth slipping out. Thankfully, Luffy wasn't as big a fool as he seemed, going along with what the cook had said. "Yeah, I've got really bad iron and testosterone problems, so I gotta eat red meat at least twice a day," He laughed, digging into the bloody barbecue. The sight of him going at the food the way he did almost made Sanji gag, but he kept his composure, looking down to his own plate to stir his noodles around.

"Nami, how's your food?" The blond cooed, changing his attention from his plate to her. She smiled as she brought a forkful of food to her mouth. "Perfect as always, Sanji! Thanks again for this!" Her comment made his heart soar and his cheeks turned red. And though Usopp was used to it, having been friends with the two for over ten years, Luffy very much was new to it. "Hey, so are you guys dating?" The dark haired man asked with half a chunk of meat hanging out of his mouth. The comment made the woman across from him laugh and the blond next to him blush and shake his head furiously. "N-NO!! No way! Well...! We dated for a month when we were in high school, but that was years ago!" Sanji stuttered out, feeling embarrassed for whatever reason. Wait, why was he embarrassed? He had no reason to be, and yet... "What he's trying to say is, we dated before I realized I only liked girls," Nami clarified, giving Luffy a soft smile. Her answer made the man's face light up. "WAIT, SO YOU'RE A LESBIAN?" He shouted enthusiastically, causing Usopp to laugh and nearly choke on his mouthful of fettuccine. Nami and Sanji couldn't help but also find themselves laughing at the outburst. "Hey, c'mon, what's so funny? I think it's cool that you're a lesbian!" There was that word again. Cool. He seemed to find a lot of things were cool today, Sanji noticed. It almost made his earlier statement outback feel less special.

After their dinner had concluded, Sanji took it upon himself to clear the table and wash dishes as the other three continued on in conversation. "Hm... Maybe it was... Since I was seventeen? No, maybe sixteen... Well, I knew I was trans when I was in highschool," Luffy stated, watching his two co-hosts look him over in awe. Though he was cleaning up, Sanji was listening along as well, feeling his heart flutter as Luffy spoke of his journey and experiences. It made him feel somewhat safer and closer to him. "My brothers have both been really supportive ever since I came out!! My oldest brother Sabo even bought me a binder for my nineteenth birthday," he smiled as he went on. "Hey, that's great to hear! I'm glad your family can be there for you, man. And I know we just met today, but you can count on us to support and uplift you too!" Usopp grinned, swinging his arm around Nami's shoulders. 

"W-Woah, hey!! Luffy!" Nami suddenly cried out, causing Sanji to drop the pan he was working with back into the sink and whip his head around in a panic. To his surprise, Luffy's face was red and his eyes were threatening to spill over with tears and Usopp had leaned over to him with a comforting hand placed on his shoulder. "You guys...!! You guys are the best!!" The small man wailed, practically throwing himself at the curly haired man. The red head placed her manicured hand on the guest's head, giving him a comforting pat as Usopp awkwardly patted his back while trapped in his embrace. Sanji's worry faded, a look of softness replacing it. "Hey, it's getting late, why don't I take you down to your apartment," the cook offered, walking over to the dinner table as he dried his hands on a dish towel. 

The other two said their goodbye's and goodnight's as Sanji and Luffy departed. "You've got some pretty cool friends, Sanji," Luffy laughed as they got into the elevator. Giving the smaller one a nudge with his elbow, the blond said, "They're your friends too, y'know." That's right! Usopp had said so himself, and Nami even agreed! He'd gained two new friends that day! The thought was enough to make him blush and fidget with his hands. Sanji watched on with a blush of his own as the elevator doors opened. Seeing such a fierce killer get so sheepish over making friends was... Kind of cute, Sanji thought as they'd reached the front door of the cannibal's apartment. "Tonight was fun!! Thanks for having me over, Sanji! Next time we should have dinner here so I can cook for you!!" Luffy's enthusiasm made the blond's heart skip a beat. He wanted to try cooking? Had he absorbed _that much_ in just a couple of "lessons"? "Yeah... I think I'd like that," Sanji replied, placing a hand on top of the short man's head, causing him to smile at the touch. Luffy nodded and pumped his fists into the air. "Alright!! Then it's a date!" 

A date. A... A date. A DATE?


End file.
